Romanticization

I have a habit that I'm trying to kick.  It isn't dangerous to my health or anything of the sort, but it is a source of near constant letdown.  I am ALWAYS instantly romanticizing things.  Whenever I start something new, my imagination kicks into overdrive.  I constantly imagine being the best at whatever I do, surpassing everyone's expectations.  Turns out those rose tinted fantasies are rarely met.

For example, I recently was newly employed at an old folks home for the elderly Jewish community.  I was essentially a waitress, making sure everyone was taken care of in the dining room every night.  Early on in my job, I felt like a queen of waitresses.  I picked up everything quickly, and was able to do my job relatively well, relatively fast.

As the weeks went on, the old folk began to take their emotional toll.  Comments I shrugged off before slowly started to annoy me.  On one occasion I was told that I should eat all the dessert myself, because I was too thin and wouldn't survive the coming winter... I'll show her.  On another, I was berated for having hair that was 'TOO BLOND.  YOU MUST HAVE DYED".  All natural, baby.  After a few more days, reality came and mugged me in a dark alley.  I blinked... and poof!  Everything dissolved around me.

Maybe my ID badge wasn't as beautiful as I had originally though.

Poof.

And I certainly didn't look like a beauty queen in my uniform.

Poof. 

It's pretty hard to pull off a hairnet, doesn't matter how good looking you are.

I suddenly realized that if they aren't directly related to me, I don't like old people that much.  In all honesty, they make me really sad.  Now that I'm back at school, I don't have to worry about it for a while.  Even so, I still don't like being crushed by reality like that.

This isn't a recent phenomena.  In elementary I realized I could plant things and make them grow.  So, I planted seeds from the tree outside my house every-frigging-where.  I figured I was a regular Johnny Appleseed.  Within a week I had forgotten about it, and went quickly back to playing Link to the Past on my Gameboy.  Those seeds never did grow.  I imagine there is an Indian somewhere weeping over that fact, like I cried the first time I saw the end of Forrest Gump.

I'll break from that little tangent and get back to my main point.

This romanticizing happens even more frequently when I have a crush.  Since May I have had a wicked crush on this dude who works at a store I frequent.  And while most of my visits were run of the mill interactions, my imagination took the wheel and on occasion ended up being incredibly distracting.

I would go in, all nonchalant like, and say something to the effect of:

And then I'd probably ask Game Guy if the store got a new DLC that I should buy, and he'd totally reply:

We'd then make plans for later in the evening, I assume, and pick up the conversation about here...

Stumbling back into reality from Alli Land can be a bitch.

However.

I had mentioned first and foremost here that romanticizing generally leads to disappointment over time.  However... that doesn't seem to be the case with Game Guy.  More on that later. :)